parenting

Distinguishing Behaviours — The Difference Between Shyness, Introversion and Social Anxiety

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

During the formative years of childhood and adolescence, it can be difficult for a parent to understand what their child is going through.

Particularly when it comes to mental and emotional challenges, the lines between what’s normal and what might need to be addressed can be very blurry.

Depression versus sadness; anxiety versus stress; learning difficulties versus disengagement…

They can all present overlapping signs and symptoms.

That’s why psychologists are constantly researching and analysing these conditions, so that they can be addressed and rectified as early as possible.

Social anxiety, shyness and introversion are three concepts which can be confused for this exact reason — they all lie on the same spectrum.

But while the latter two can be harmless and even positive personality traits, social anxiety can interrupt a sufferer’s ability to function on a day to day basis.

So what’s the difference?

Why We Should Avoid Asking ‘Why?’

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

When children exhibit behaviour we disapprove of or don’t understand, one thing often comes to mind (and from our mouths)…

Why?

‘Why haven’t you done your homework?’

‘Why did you leave your clothes on the floor?’

‘Why aren’t you playing with your friends today?’

The list of curiosities and questions goes on and on, likely on a daily basis.

But there’s a good reason why we should avoid asking why, says our staff psychologist Christina Rigoli, and it’s all about clarity of communication.

Starting the New School Year on the Right Foot

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Summer holidays have been and gone, and the beginning of the new school year is upon us.

And the transition from long days and late bed times back to a rigid routine can be a bit of a shock to the system.

But with some effort put into how you and your children will approach the new school year, you can make the change as smooth as possible and help your child get the most out of their schooling.

So with some reflections from our blog posts from over the years, here are some of our top tips for making 2017 your child’s best academic year yet.

How to Become a Better Listener

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

A concept that comes up a lot on this blog and in our dealings with children and parents is the importance of listening.

Really listening to your children is an integral way to build or maintain a healthy and mutually respectful relationship.

And especially for adolescents, having someone to talk to openly and honestly about the challenges you are facing can make all the difference…

For parents, actively listening to your children helps you to understand where they’re coming from in all matter of issues, from bullying to problematic behaviour or depression and anxiety…

And this can help you to make better choices in your interactions with them going forward.

But how do we know if we’re being good listeners?

And how can we become better listeners?

Believing in Santa Claus: Harmless or Hurtful?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

So the Christmas period is well and truly over…

But various media outlets have begged the question:

Should the Santa myth be over too?

The Benefits of Boredom

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

‘Children need to sit in their own boredom for the world to become quiet enough that they can hear themselves’ – Dr Vanessa Lapointe

With the school holidays upon us, many parents will be frantically trying to find new ways to fend off boredom for their kids.

And thinking of new and exciting activities to do is always going to be a good thing…

Organised activities involving sports, music or education have proven to be beneficial to a child’s physical, cognitive, cultural and social development.

But there is also something to be said for allowing a child to be left to their own devices, or to experience ‘boredom’, according to Teresa Belton, visiting fellow at The School of Education and Lifelong Learning.

Are You Monitoring Your Own Technology Usage?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Are you concerned that your child is addicted to technology, or spends too much time looking at screens?

You may want to take a look at your own digital usage…

A recent study in the US found that parents spend on average 9 hours and 22 minutes a day looking at digital screens.

And only an hour and a half of that time was for work!

Why Parents Should Feel Good About Saying ‘NO’ to Their Children

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Saying ‘no’ frequently to your young children may be the opposite of your parental instincts.

But according to Georgia Manning ‑ counsellor, psychotherapist and the director of Wellbeing For Kids ‑ saying ‘no’ to your kids is one of the best things you can do for them.

Manning puts this down to the fact that many parents have shied away from saying ‘no’ to their children because of the ‘self-esteem movement’, where anything that could potentially damage a child’s self-esteem was frowned upon.

But as a result, ‘the pendulum has swung too far’.

‘We’ve gone from not being emotionally attuned with our children to thinking that protecting them from any discomfort or things that they don’t want to do is a way of showing love.’

6 Things to Do if You Don’t Like Your Children’s Friends

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

We just posted on the blog some Dos and Don’ts of getting involved in your children’s friendships…

But what do you do if you just really don’t like one of their friends?

As a parent, there is a strong likelihood that your feelings are coming from a gut instinct that the friend in question is not a good influence on your child, in one way or another.

But as we discussed in the last post, the best thing you can do for your child is to help them navigate their friendships, rather than taking control over them.

The latter would not only be detrimental to your child’s social life and skills, but also to your relationship with them.

So then how do we deal with our own feelings towards our child’s friends?

Should Parents Get Involved in Their Kid’s Friendships?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

All parents want to protect their children from the challenges that life throws at them.

And navigating the complicated and highly emotional world of friendship-forming is no different.

But like most ongoing processes of life and growing up, there’s only so much you can do to support their journey, and getting too involved can often do more harm than good.

‘Parents need to view these situations as opportunities to teach their child valuable life lessons‘, says friendship expert Dana Kerford.

How can we help?

Book your initial parent consultation to get the right advice for your child's needs

Why have 2,866* parents chosen us?