Behaviour Management

What Do You Do if Your Child is the Bully?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Bullying is likely to affect your child during some part of their young lives.

In fact, Government-funded research showed that one in four students will encounter bullying during their school years.

Yet the frequency with which bullying occurs doesn’t diminish the significance of its impact.

And as heartbreaking as it can be when your own child is the victim of bullying, learning that they may be the perpetrator can be an even bitterer pill to swallow.

But when it comes to bullying — on whichever side of the coin — it’s important to address the issues at hand, as soon as possible.

So what should we consider when we think our own child may be the bully?

A Golden Rule of Parenting – Stop Thinking Everything You Do Is Wrong

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Our aim with this blog is to help individuals with some of the challenges that come with being a parent or caretaker.

We aim to give professional, impartial and educated advice from our team of psychologists, while citing credible sources and expert references from around the world.

But even if you’re not looking for it and not on this blog, you — like so many others — are likely inundated with parenting advice from every man and their dog on a daily basis… in the news, on social media, from other parents, or from overheard conversations in cafes!

It’s no wonder that seeking out parenting advice, in general, can be a very overwhelming experience.

So a recent article in The New York Times brings up a single, inspiring piece of advice that can be universal to all concerned parents:

Stop thinking everything you do is wrong.

How Much Screen Time is Too Much?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Lisa Wilkinson recently made some controversial comments about parents who let their children have ‘screen time’ under the age of five.

Wilkinson called these parents ‘crazy’ and said:

‘Come back to me when they’re 14 and they’re completely and utterly addicted to their screens, they have no social skills, that’s when you realise that what you did early has come back to bite you’.

Many parents have understandably been offended by Wilkinson’s comments.

Not only is the use of digital technology increasingly prevalent and useful in the adult world, but it’s also an important part of school curriculums — even in kindergarten.

And let’s be honest — the interactive and dynamic medium entrances kids, and can give parents some valuable time to get their own things done.

So what is the right amount of screen time for children, if any?

And how do we moderate their usage?

What Constitutes Too Sick for School?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Many children (and adults!) will try to ‘chuck a sickie’ once in their lives.

But when the parents are in control, how can you tell when a sick day from school is justified?

There are a number of issues that come into play.

The Psychology of Cleaning

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

‘Tidy House, Tidy Mind’.

A phrase we have most likely all considered at some point in our lives… usually when we’re in the middle of a distinctly un-tidy situation!

And in recent years, the topics of cleaning and de-cluttering have even featured in the NYT best-seller list…

Why?

Because tidying has been linked with both good and bad outcomes.

Sibling Rivalry – All’s Fair in Love and Parenting … But What IS Fairness?

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

In a recent blog post, we discussed the issue of family favouritism.

We wanted to reassure parents that having a favourite is part of human nature (and not the same as loving one child more or less than another), and should not be a source of guilt or shame.

What’s important is how you act on your inclination towards one child or the other.

Giving overt extra attention to one child over another can result in cries of ‘but it’s not fair!’.

And ultimately, this can lead to problematic behaviour, resentment, and sibling rivalry…

Which raises an interesting question – how do we define ‘fairness’?

Why You Shouldn’t Help Your Kids With Their Homework

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

If you’re like most parents of school-aged kids, you’ve probably witnessed an anxious child struggling with a challenging homework task.

The temptation to help them in some way can be very strong…

And even when the ‘help’ starts off with a gentle nudge in the right direction, it can sometimes end up with the child sleeping on the couch while you finish off the project!

It’s perfectly understandable. We want to stop children from being anxious, while helping them to succeed.

But it’s best not to help too much.

Why?

10 Tips for Being a Better Parent: From a School Principal

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Teachers may not be child psychologists, but they sure know kids.

Their day-to-day activities, likes and dislikes, attitudes and behaviours…

And they’ve often got good insights into where their behaviours come from.

A recent article in The Guardian revealed how teachers might sometimes understand more about your kids than you realise.

This author of the article — a school principal in the UK — has identified a number of strategies we often use in our work with children and parents.

5 Ways For Parents to Keep Anger at Bay

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

There’s no denying that with all the joys of parenthood there can also be a lot of stress and frustration.

Temper tantrums, complaints and demands… It’s understandable this would try any parent’s patience.

And sometimes the result is an angry outburst.

But unfortunately anger directed towards your child can have a very negative impact on your relationship with them and on their own temperament.

And it can also encourage more acting out or misbehaving.

So how can we better manage our own emotions when it comes to parenting challenges?

Helping Parents to Help Their Children Thrive

by Melbourne Child Psychology & School Psychology Services

Back in 1986, The Jamaica Test revealed some very interesting findings about the effect of parental attitudes on children’s behaviour.

Researchers divided the families of 129 children into two groups:

One group received weekly hour-long visits from a trained researcher, who encouraged the parents to spend more quality time with their children — reading, playing games and singing songs.

And the other group received nutritional supplements each week, without the parental coaching.

The results?

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